LEFT: Mathieu Doby of Belgium competes in the Men's Kayak Single (K1) Semi Final at the London 2012 Olympic Games at Lee Valley White Water Centre, Aug. 1, 2012. RIGHT: U.S. surfer Koloche Andino competes in the Association of Surfing Professionals' men's 2012 ASP World Championship Tour at Barra da Tijuca beach in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, May 14, 2012.
Drop it: Canoeing and Sailing
Rowing is an elegant if effete sport to watch and the fitness level of these people is remarkable. But let’s draw the line at canoeing. There must be a dozen medal events for a race in which you stand up in a boat and stab the water. This is inappropriate seamanship for starters, but it belies the very idea of the craft: a delicate slipper of a boat designed to glide silently along the water. Somehow this doesn’t seem to be what the Algonquins had in mind. We need to stop this armada right now before rubber raft racing becomes a medal sport. And sailing? What kind of a spectator sport is that: the boats are million miles away from the crowd. The boats could be halfway to Bermuda for all we know it. This would be better as a video game.
Add it: Surfing
If you want a shore event, let’s add surfing. Yes, it would favor the coast nations like Brazil and Australia and even China and India, but now there are even surfing events indoors with artificial wave machines, so everyone can practice. Beach volleyball, which got famous at Bondi Beach in Sydney, has deserted the beach. The next Olympics are in Brazil: a perfect spot to start a water sport, at the beach, that everyone can watch.